Restoration Journal #2 Story Time + The Call + The Embrace + Prophecy Update

Born into a large family of ten, to a mother that lived life as a lover of the world, crack cocaine, and of men. From the very beginning, she was a product of the system, foster care, family care, the same as all of her siblings. At the age of two, she can vividly remember being adopted into a loving family only to be given back to the system. Celebrating Holidays and Birthdays at foster homes with strange children and people was the norm for her. Sharing a room with six others, a bed with four others was life as normal. It was never a dull or lonely moment in her childhood, for she always had a host of siblings, whether they were blood-related or not, to love on and be loved by. Although she was content living, with what she thought was a decent life, she soon found a love for reading. Books took her places, across borders that her feet weren't permitted to go .. just yet. Then there were the adolescent years. Her foundation was more stable. Her home was with her aunt, sisters, and cousins. She got involved in school activities, met friends, expanding her family even more. She often kept her childhood a secret. After all, she didn't even have a baby picture to reflect back on. She began to get attention from men. Grown men, married men. She knew nothing about marriage. She never even saw a marriage. All of her aunts were alone. Her father? Well, he'd soon come into the picture, but for now, no. Married men began to take well advantage of an absent father in her life. Thinking nothing more to it, at the age of nineteen, ignorantly, she began a brief journey of interfering with godly covenants - unions that God had joined together. That didn't last long, God soon intervened and set her on a different path of life. A path that led her into her destiny.

20, Living Life On Runways, Modeling.

It was a sunny afternoon in March 2014 when she was invited out to lunch by a friend, in hope of scoring this woman that he had his eyes on for a while. "Sure I'll go. However, I don't see the point of bringing a girl to lunch if you're trying to get another one. That's silly." She told her friend, still tagging along. After ordering from the menu, she looks up to see another man taking a seat at the table. He embraced her friend and greeted her out of politeness. She turned her attention to the television, to the latest game that was broadcasting, and left them to their guy talk. Every now and then she would get a glimpse of him until they happen to lock eyes. Suddenly, the atmosphere in the restaurant on that late March afternoon got thick. ''You're surely into that pot roast" He said jokingly. "First meal since church" I replied. "Did you attend Sunday service?" "No. I spent the day grilling for my Mom and family. We get together a lot." That was all they shared in conversation that day. Walking out to the car, preparing to leave, he held the door open, giving her a compliment, "Your smile, it's beautiful." making her blush. She was finally able to get an eye full of him. He had fairly light brown eyes, curly dark hair, arms full of ink. It was during the drive home when her friend asked, "Is it ok to give my friend A1 your number? He asked about you." And that was the beginning.

Time flew. On the first date, she wanted to see "Noah's Ark" - (I know, boring). So boring, that he fell asleep in her lap, in the movie theater. He later confessed that he only went along to try to make things official. Within the next couple of months, things moved fast. It went from casually dating to serious dating. Moving in, meeting families, daughters, and friends.

After one year of dating, loving, fornicating, drinking, and living, her old habits began to tug at her. She couldn't shake her past lifestyle. It was as if a battle was within her. She was happy and in love. Finally, she had met someone that she could have fun and dream with however, he didn't know exactly who she was, truly on the inside. She portrayed this innocent, dreamy woman, but the truth was she destroyed men and bruised their egos. She knew she needed help. This monster that she struggled with since nineteen was back haunting her so she set out to get some help. She desperately wanted to save the one and only relationship she had ever truly felt adored in. She called her Pastor at the time and shared with him all that she was struggling with, the urge to cheat. She wanted help. Told him that she was experiencing desires to be with other men, married men but she wanted to remain faithful with her now-boyfriend. She could really REALLY see a future with him. His advice, "I'm going to pray and send The Helper your way."

4th of July 2016 Celebrating My Salvation Day

It was several months later, the 4th of July 2015, when Help showed up in the most life-changing, beautiful way ever. It was in the garage of her boyfriends house that she broke and cried out for a change of heart. She didn't want to live life battling the desires to interfere with godly covenants. That summer afternoon, she had an encounter with Jesus that took the very appetite - the desire to hurt men, out of her mouth. The darkness she dealt quietly with was gone. She experienced the love of The Father so strong that day, that it was overbearing to stand and embody such an overwhelming love. Afterward she went into the house from the garage, dancing - praising God. From there, she no longer had a love for alcohol or fornication. She became celibate. That one miraculous encounter delivered her of so much. Secretly she was relieved that the monster that quietly dwelled on the inside of her was gone. Contrary to her joy of newfound freedom and salvation, her then-boyfriend, soon-to-be husband was the least bit enthused about it all. "You're no longer in love with me, but Jesus. God has stolen my girlfriend. You were perfect for me." He screamed one evening in distress. Little did he know, she sought help just to save them. He never fully understood exactly what she meant when she said, "I was terrible before I met you." I was dark on the inside. Meeting you, loving you, inspired me to fight for my freedom. Freedom from the desire to interfere with godly covenants, marriages. Freedom from bruising men's egos. Gaining salvation was the beginning of her husband despising her, moreover, love still abounded between the both of them. After all, it was love that their foundation was built on. He popped the question the very next month in August of 2015, and they later married six months later in March of 2016. Right after their wedding, a Mother of Zion wanted to pray with them, "There's something the Lord wants to tell the both of you," she spoke to them "God will use you all marriage for His Glory. There will come a time when both of you will be at odds with one another. I see a woman that will come in between your marriage. Your backs will turn to one another, however, God will restore because I see you all facing one another again. Daughter, God will use you to bring a lot of women into the Kingdom of Heaven. There will come a time when your husband will be completely helpless. His life will be on the line, but God will send you to help save him, it's then that your ministry will begin. It will be a lonely time for you, however, I hear the Lord say, get out of the boat like Peter and walk to Him. Do not look to the attractions left or right but keep your focus on Him. He will surely bring you through it all." The prophecies didn't stop there, they kept coming of how prosperous their ministry and business would be and the children God would bless them with.

It was 2019 when that very prophecy began to unfold in their life/marriage at a rapid speed. Quicker than one would've liked. One thing she kept with her was the promise that God would use her mightily for mothers, wives, and families. "You will be a help to put out the fire to many burning homes. Your ministry will emerge during the end times." 2020 it seemed as if life fell apart at the hems, one sem at a time. Everything lost. Marriage tore into, children scattered, health declined speedily, finances took a hit, friends and family became strangers. The only thing that stood was her faith. The breath knocked out of her chest, she stood on Faith, for she knew what she was experiencing was not the end at that is was much bigger than her. Same as in 2015, she sought help and inquired of The Lord for help. Direction. Answers. The answer that heaven gave was everything.

"A curse from your grandmother's blood that removes the peace out of your family and marriages has now come for yours. Stand, be equipped for battle. I will be with you. I will fight through you. I will restore your life. I will find your goods and bring them back, just stand and allow me fight. I desire to use you. I want to invest my glory in your life." Although that powerful Word was very encouraging, she didn't end there, she dug even deeper. Inquiring truth from her family, what was it about her grandmother, whom she had never had the pleasure of meeting, that would bring about a curse, snare on her seed. She will never forget the conversations between her and her aunt and uncles. It was Easter of 2020 when they talked on the phone and told her everything pertaining to her family lineage. "Your grandmother was cursed. She had a relationship with a married man and his wife cursed her. His wife would plead with our Mother to leave her husband alone. But niece, she wouldn't. Our mother went as far as having a child with the married man. Nobody knew that his wife was a witch until she cursed our Mother. Afterward, Mama fell sick. She began to drink heavily. She lost all of her hair, she went bald. Her health began to deteriorate. She got cancer out of nowhere. Before her, cancer had never been in our family tree. Our dad, your grandfather took her to every doctor in town seeking help for her but no one could help her. She would always scream out in madness that her lovers' wife cursed her. "She cursed me, she bewitched me," she would get drunk and cry out at times. People wrote her off as crazy, but her children, we knew it was more to it. After our dad died, she got involved even heavier in alcohol. She met a younger man and he destroyed her life. She died from complications after surgery after cancer tore into her body some type of bad. And now niece, every marriage in our bloodline has ended in a divorce. Every last one of our mother and father children's marriages ended with divorce. And all of their children, which is your generation has ended in divorce for one reason or another. All of your siblings, all of your cousin's marriages were destroyed. Not to mention the rate our family is dying to this disease called "cancer". It's a curse. I just know it. I've had Pastor after Pastor to tell me of this curse that plagued our family, but I had no idea to how to stop it, so I just accepted that divorce would be a thing that we just had to accept. But you say God has chosen you to break it, huh?"

Bridal Portrait. After The Vows Came The Battles

It all made sense. All of it. The reason she struggled with the desire to deal with married men. It all stemmed back from her late grandmother and her iniquity of having affairs with married men. It was an evil heritage that she inherited from her grandmother and mother spiritually. "Lord" she called out as she knelt in prayer, "I accept the call on my life to stand and fight and destroy this curse that has ran rapid in my bloodline for decades, stealing over 20 marriages from my family. It stops now. Before me. My children and children's children and those far off will not be a recipient of a broken home. I will pass on blessings, not curses. I'm yours. Lead me how You see fit. Take me through the process of breaking such a stronghold. I'm yours. Use my marriage for your glory, Lord."

She left her prayer room that evening feeling empowered more than ever. Her enemy was no longer in the physical but in the spiritual. Everything made sense, so much sense now. The call on her life made sense even more. Because of her grandmother's iniquity to break covenants, she was cursed by a scarred lover - his wife. The curse destroyed every marriage that was in her family tree ... except hers. The weapon of divorce formed by the enemy against her family would not prosper and she was sure of it. That curse would not be passed on. She thought of her older siblings, whose marriages have all ended in divorce. They had beautiful families and to think that our foremother sin, iniquity had caused such pain and despair in her children and children's children lives was sad. She thought on her aunts and uncles, and their children, her cousins whose marriage and family had been destroyed. Glory to God for remembering her family, remembering her bloodline, and showing great, great mercy.

Although 2020 started with separation and heartache, she had hope after encouraging from her Spiritual leaders to fight. Looking back, people wondered why she was so unbothered about the matters that were taking place in her marriage and family, but truth was, she was about her business. In the midst of pain, people wondered why she was so at peace and hopeful, little did they know, Jesus had a plan. *wink* Despite how things portrayed to be to the naked eye, Jesus had an agenda all along - to get Glory for working a miracle in a hopeless situation such as her marriage and family. She distanced herself from family as she allowed God to deal with her. She removed herself from social media and enrolled in a spiritual warfare class, equipping her with the knowledge to break curses. All 2020, 2021 she made it a habit, a lifestyle to seek God during the early mornings in prayer and worship. Every plot, plan of the enemy to destroy her marriage had to be stopped, severed, and uprooted in Jesus Name. Little did she know, she was being trained to be a weapon against the darkness that would come against marriages and homes, starting with her broken marriage first, and her ministry would emerge during The End Times.

Oh, friend just in case you're wondering who is she throughout it all, she is me, Mrs. Walker. A village raised me, I got off path during college years by interfering with marriages, and later God set me on a path of righteousness fo His names sake. Exactly how does this tie into restoration this month of February? The call on my life, my ministry, my story all circle around my beginning. I like to joke sometimes and tell people that I was sent for by the enemy and I had two choices, either I could've accepted its tactics to continue to steal marriages from my bloodline or I could put of a fight with prayer. I chose to take a stand against divorce in Jesus' Mighty Name and allow God Almighty to fight for me. While He fought for me, I simply stood in faith and obedience. People looked upon me and baffled at my faith my confidence that God would restore my marriage and use it for His glory. I had so much to fight for instead of just for me. I had my family to get justice for. I wanted to bring hope to wives and mothers that God will do for them, what He did for me. I fought for the lost that would come to salvation through my testimony. Many look upon my life as if it's just about a marriage, but it has always been more to it all. I've been called crazy more times than I can count, a fool. Yet, not one weapon that the enemy has formed has prospered over my life nor my family. In fact, I've been blessed more in the last two years of my life than I ever have, when I sought out to take back my goods from the enemy camp by force.

If Eve, our foremother could bring all of mankind into damnation, how much more power do you possess as a Mother? Wife? Daughter of The King? I was never concerned about what things looked like. I kept my eyes gazing upon Jesus and my ears tuned to His voice. After resurfacing back to the social media light in late 2021, the world thought I had lost my mind because I came back with joy and I wasn't afraid to show it. I refused to bow to anything and nothing discouraged me. not fear, not intimidation, not anything. Instead, I rested in the immeasurable peace of God. Reassuring myself daily that I am exactly who The Word declares I am. I can do what The Word says I can do and I can have what the Word says I can have.

February 9, 2021

"Hey I'm leaving for California soon, and I want to bring Evelyn Valentines' gift by the house." What a sweet and thoughtful gesture I thought to myself as the balloons, candy, and bear came pouring in during drop-off time."Just so you know, I'm going to eat all of the candy that you bought her," I said jokingly and truthfully. It was when my husband turned to leave out of the door when he stood still for a second, facing the door, back to me and asked, "are you really happy?" I was caught off guard from the question honestly so I asked "what do you mean am I happy?" "Are you really this happy or are you hiding depression?" I was still speechless and lost or words so he continued."You don't look sad or depress or anything. You keep yourself together, I see you've gained all of the weight back that you'd lost after we seperated. You keep the house clean and all, but I'm just asking are you really this happy or is it a face that you put on when I'm around. I'm asking 'cause I'm not doing so well. I'm not in a good place and I haven't been in a while." It was actually hard to hold back a smile on my end, "No I'm not depressed or hiding it. What you see, is what it is. I got myself the much needed help I needed while we've been apart. I had a lot of deep rooted child hood trauma that I had to get healed from." I said beaming with pride. "Do you remember that prophecy that was spoken to me at the end of 2019? That I was soon to go through a deep deliverance to purge my bloodline and break generational curses? Well, it happened. And I'm assuming that is what you can sense now, sincere joy." Listening to me, nodding in agreement that he remembered, he smiled. "Ok, well can I get a hug? We haven't hugged in forever." For the first time in two years, we embraced one another, with a hug. "Nothing much to it, just a hug," I thought to myself then, but looking back that was a breakthrough in our marriage that at the time I was clueless to. After sending him off, I couldn't help but laugh to myself while thinking, "Wow! Jesus! The seeds of prayer I sowed all 2020 is beginning to sprout. The deliverance that took place in my life in 2020 is evident, even my husband can notice a change and freedom in my personality and character."

2021 + Current. Victorious. Hopeful. Faithful.

If you're reading this blog today and you're facing a really challenging time in your marriage, I encourage you to take heart. One thing that I did early on in our separation was give myself, my husband, and our vows to The Lord. I would tell him daily that my vows are in His hands and that if any devil desire to destroy it, they would have to come to take them from You, out of your powerful, mighty hands. I trusted God from the very beginning. I leaned on Him for everything and He has been just that, my everything, the in-between, and all in all. I took Him at His very Word when He declared that what "He joined together could not be put asunder." (Mark 10:9) Start there by seeking God for his direction for your marriage and be sensitive to the leading of His Spirit. Spend time in worship, it will help with the pain. If you're in need of insight to start your own relationship with The Father, I encourage you to enroll in my "To The Heart of The Fathers" Zoom Course.

DREAM PROPHECY UPDATE. Last year, twice I blogged about a dream and open vision that God gave me pertaining to our country being at war. In the dream, bombs sounded off suddenly. It was very unsafe to go outside, food and water became vital. It's hard to miss what's taking place in the World, the news of Ukraine and Russia is on every social platform. My point, prepare yourselves spiritually. Pray diligently in this hour. My next blog post will consist of an encouraging word for this season.

Couple of Things,

I've received several emails from women asking, requiring more on my current Restoration Journey. I try to respond as soon as I can and as best as I can. Subscribing to my website, blog at www.pameliawalker.com will keep you informed with all of my ministry updates. Be encouraged.

Jesus Is Just That Good,

Pamelia Walker